...take a hike in oakland (vol. 01)...
“It is not our job to remain whole.
We came to lose our leaves
Like the trees, and be born again,
Drawing up from the great roots.”
― Robert Bly
Is a hike just a walk? Porgletalk! Not if you crawl for a portion of it, or swim during it, or sit and smoke hobbit like while contemplating bark colours and needle scents. I mean by the book, a hike is a long walk especially for pleasure or exercise. But I’m a filthy cryptozoological gent who finds great meaning in ascertaining a hike as an opportunity to see that which you have not. To hike is to YOU and to that end I encourage…go take a hike…in Oakland…
HIKING SONG OF THE DAY
It is a most wonderful time of the year in Oakland, California. October summer has ended and the cool clouds and shortened days bring with it sweater temps, and with some luck some rainy love for the land. Oakland presents many a story…Hyphy, Black Panthers, Bay Bridges, Bad Baseball and if you consume any national media, probably nothing but stories of crime, criminals and crimey criminal creepers. But as is true with pretty much anywhere, there is a lot more to it than meets the eye. Oakland was the inspiration for Disneyland (well fairyland in Oakland that is), is the home of the Mai Tai, and much more.
I am here to tell you however that Oakland, and the larger East Bay area is also home to some of the greatest hiking in the world. The East Bay Regional Park District, EBPRD for short, is the largest urban regional park district in the United States. As of 2020, the EBRPD spanned 124,909 acres with 73 parks and over 1,330 miles of trails. The district includes a former farm, a former coal mine, an extinct volcano, and one of the biggest dog-walking parks in the country.
I have hiked every park, and every trail in the EBPRD, and figured if nothing else I could share with you some good recommendations on where you should take a hike. Over time I’ll tell you a bit about all these trails and I’ll share pics and my rambling gambling brain sack as I traverse steps with my trusty dog party in tow.
HIKING FACT OF THE DAY
“Hiking” is worth 14 points in a game of Scrabble — [you can do better, now find those Q words!]
OAKLAND FACT OF THE DAY
Like most things American, the trails and redwood parks of Oakland were stolen Native land. Consider donating to your usage here. On a brighter note Oakland invented the popsicle. Just look at this suggestive patent created by thee 11 year olde…
HIKING TIP OF THE DAY
Pack it in and pack it out. I met a man named Jason the Mason at a hot springs bar somewhere in the greater Sierras. He had hiked the Pacific Crest Trail from top to bottom every year starting from when he was ten years old. At 40 years old this meant the dude had 30 years of hiking thousands of miles of trails a year. His one piece of advice was to pick up any trash you ever see on a trail.
To leave the trash is to invite others to see that space as a trash can and to forever further the cycle to garbaging. Don’t be a jerk and just bring a bag to capture your material wastes. The great hiking owl god Torvukious-Fornter-Legge will thank you for your efforts if you do so. And if you don’t they will haunt your daydreams with their spider black teeth, their hooven vantablack wings, and their incessantly seo-driven lip-synching fail videos.
Anyhoo & Alachoo-Kachew, the below is a transcribe of my ever maddening thoughts as I progressed one of my favorite five mile loops with my dogs Minnesota-Pops-McFatsaroni-Racecar-Soysauce-ZigZag-Marshmallow-Sticks and his sister Sidney-Lemonada-Catdoor-Puedoweebie.
This loop is ~5 miles of relatively even terrain and ends on one of the absolute greatest trail legs in the park district, The golden spike trail. The golden spike is named as such because when there is daylight you can count on it to peer and dive betwixt the dried redwood branches leaving golden sunray splashes on your face, feet and path. This trail is good for beginners, shows you scrub, eucalyptus, squirrel, coyote and newt, and is good in boot, shoe or barefoot. I suggest ending with the spike, but you can always reverse what I said below and/or hike anywhere you darn well please…
...take a hike...oakland...vol. 01…
…YOUR TRAIL PATH INSTRUCTIONS…
TRUDEAU CENTER to DUNN TRAIL
DUNN TRAIL to BACCHARIS TRAIL
BACCHARIS to WEST RIDGE TRAIL
WEST RIDGE TRAIL to TOYON TRAIL
TOYON TRAIL to GOLDEN SPIKE TRAIL
GOLDEN SPIKE TRAIL to the lair of TORKUVIOUS-FORNTER-LEGGE